Time passes, things change...back.

Well, alls I've gotta say is that I've been having a weekend of extremes...

First of all, Andrew's party was frickin' awesome! But that was a given...

Besides that, however, I've been reverting back into exactly what I was fearing this past winter break: a loner nerd who plays videogames all day and never goes out.

To go from super social at the party, back to being hermitted within my home is a horrible feeling...one that I've been drowing out with movies and even more videogames, not to mention stuffing my face...but lets not dwell on this negativity, for I've gotta look to the future...

The immediate future being the impending strike...

Although I've been hoping that there is a strike, therefore making up for the rediculously short winter break, I know that this would not be the best for me in the end, because without the daily schooling ritual, my social life seems extremely limited...and the snow outside on the streets just compounds my unwillingness to get off my ass and do something productive...

But enough about my laziness, the very fact that I'm blogging at 3am instead of on the sofa watching tv means I'm at least admitting all of this to myself...

And another thing as long as I'm admitting things to myself, at Andrews party, I've realized many things, and have had a few epiphanies...

First of all, I have confirmed what has been racking my brain all week: I seem to have moved on...not completely, mind you, but enough so that I'm not consciously jealous or angry at the things that used to make me feel so...very good stuff, because now I see that things would've been very difficult if everything had "worked out"...but how was I able to get passed my feelings? I seem to have a definite knack for loosing interest in females who are taken, and the last I've checked, it's close enought to consider her taken...and I'm actually quite happy now! Hooray for everything! However, I'm worried that subconsciously my inaction over the last few days were influenced by this realization, but I've decided not to dwell on that theory...because, I might add, my next epiphany is much more of a reason...

I'm afraid that I couldn't take my own advice from that blog entry a while back...I seemed to have been blinded by my infatuation, and have missed out on the many "opportunities" that I would've seen...for everyone who was at the party and paying attention to me (a.k.a. no-one, but I'll continue), it would seem kinda obvious about how I reached this epiphany...looking back, I'm seeing my actions as kinda obvious, although surprisingly unintentional this time...but not that it really matters anymore, for it seems that I'm too late...but I'm rambling...

My idea of perfection changes constantly from infatuation to infatuation, but my type still remains fairly consistant...it's just that when I actually found my perfect type, I was blinded by my infatuation...and I guess that's what I was really trying to say to begin with...

But no more of this crazy falling back into lethargy, with my videogames and emulators, no not for me! I'm going to look upon the next while as I have looked upon the winter break, assuming there is a strike of course...so as God as my witness, I shall be social! I shall have friends! I will meet new people and my prospects shall grow! SCHAWING!!!

Too bad I was infatuated though, because things would've been tres different...

In any case, I still gotta hope for the best for me...maybe I'll start my "I'm short, fat, and ugly" bit again and start shaping up, lose my holiday weight and all that...

But we shall see, oh yes...we shall see indeed!

Until next time, I guess...


--> As told through the mind of an introverted extrovert.